Every now and then I check my blog’s stats on Google Analytics (it’s free and easy to install on your blog – I highly recommend it! If you’re interested, make an account and then follow these directions for installation).
Anyway, thanks to Google Analytics, I can see all the Google search terms that led people to my blog. And folks, it’s freaking FUNNY. Here are some of my favorites, along with a little commentary from yours truly. Prepare to be amused.
FAVORITE GOOGLE SEARCH TERMS THAT LED PEOPLE TO MY BLOG
1. “Is it wrong to want to kill people?” (YES)
2. “Dear diary I love a married man” (UMM, SUCKS FOR YOU)
3. “Life is crap” (YEAH, SOMETIMES)
4. “What was she doing with a shrimp fork in her purse” (THAT’S WHAT I WANT TO KNOW)
5. “Brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous” (WHY THANK YOU, I’M FLATTERED [but THIS is probably the post that Google found])
6. “Should I make major decisions while PMSing?” (ABSOLUTELY NOT)
7. “My husband whipped me” (PLEASE DIVORCE HIM. UNLESS YOU LIKED IT)
8. “I wish I could have check” (YOU AND ME BOTH)
9. “Frozen poop pictures” (THAT WAS ONLY ONE TIME!)
10. “Shrimp fork attack” (MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)
11. “How to make a diary awesome” (YOU PUT IT ON THE INTERNET AND CALL IT A BLOG)
12. “My friend’s descent into madness” (IT’s ALWAYS “THE FRIEND”)
13. “Whipped humble balls” (UM, WHAT?)
14. “Sheen attacked by little fork” (BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)
15. “How do I decorate with my husband’s animal heads” (YOU NAME THEM ALL, THEN YOU HANG STUFF ON THEM, THEN YOU TALK TO THEM THROUGHOUT THE DAY, THEN YOU BUY POTTERY BARN STUFF, CAUSE IT’S ALL REALLY NATURE-Y)
To be honest with you, I’m terrified by what all of this suggests about me and my blog. Heh heh heh. Heh heh.
Happy Sunday, and be sure and check back during the week (probably Tuesday) for the first of my upcoming “blogging tips and tricks” posts! But until then, I’ll be reading antique compilations of old Shakespeare tragedies. And since this post needs some pictures:
What? Doesn’t everyone?
Ta-ta, pretties!
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