An utterly and completely random stream of consciousness AKA word vomit post.

You know you live an extraordinarily dull suburban life when a fight in the HEB (grocery store) parking lot is the highlight of your entire day.

I kid you not people, I was just getting out of my car at the grocery store a bit ago when I heard a woman screaming, “You’re calling me a whore?!  YOU’RE CALLING ME A WHORE?! There are children in my car!” And some shady looking guy was dodging stuff she was throwing at him while another guy stood nearby. 

It was excellent!  I wanted terribly to stay and watch, but I didn’t want to be that rude gawking bystander.  I thought about it the whole time I was inside HEB, itching to get out and watch the spectacle.  By the time I got back out, the police were there and things had quieted down.  Dangit.

Anyway, I just thought it was funny.  Definitely not the norm, and it sort of brightened up what was an otherwise boring and routine day.  Is that a little sadistic?

Don’t answer that.

Speaking of sadistic, I’m almost done with the last Twilight book, and the depression is already starting to settle in.  Thoughts: am I the only one who was extremely disappointed by the way the honeymoon—ahem—SCENES were skimmed over?  I mean, what’s up with that?  I was looking forward to that part pretty much ever since I picked up the first book! I feel cheated.  Stupid young adult lit!  The movie better make up for it.  I mean, come on, Bella and Edward are married! The teeny boppers should be able to handle it.

That reminds me of one time my mom caught me making my Barbie and Ken make out.  I was, I dunno, eight or nine years old?  And Barbie and Ken were totally about to get in on, no question about it.  So there I was, smashing their faces together, when I looked up and saw my mom staring down at me as she leaned against the door frame, a concerned look on her face.

I remember quite vividly the way sheer humiliation washed over me, and I threw my Barbie and Ken to the ground before shouting, “THEY’RE MARRIED THOUGH, MOMMY!”

HA.  But my point is, Bella and Edward are married, so come on now.  We want to see some of the vampire sexy time.  I may have to write some of my own fan fiction now, to satisfy the empty hole in my life left by the lack of explicitness of that honeymoon.  Sigh.

I’m out.